I caved

I went into the OB’s office this morning. Because….

1. I had blood in my stool on Monday night and Tuesday morning and it freaked me out.

2. I am flying home this weekend and my family is going to want to talk about the babies and I have been dreading feeling scared about those convos because I haven’t actually seen the babies in weeks.

3. I’m totally a WIMP my friends! I couldn’t take the wait to next Friday!

So I called the nurse yesterday to discuss the blood and she said it was either a) tearing (gross, I’m sorry) or b) hemorrhoids (heretofore to be know as H or Hs because I think that is a pretty nast word and I don’t like typing it). Both of which are normal for suuuuuuper constie folks like me. But I was very tired yesterday, and highly emotional, and stressed about some work drama, and I must admit I started to cry a bit while I was talking to the nurse, and before I knew it I was booked for a “quick pop-in with the midwife” for 8am this morning.

The midwife at my clinic is soooooo nice. She is a twin herself and loves twin patients. She wheeled in the mini ultrasound machine as she entered my room so I knew I wouldn’t even have to beg for a quick peek. She said it had been almost a month since I’d seen them and why don’t we just give me some peace of mind. FINE BY ME!!!!

The babies looked great! Baby A was chilling, perhaps napping, but then Baby B had hiccups and was moving around and seemed to wake up Baby A before our eyes. They are very cute, I melted into a puddle, and that’s pretty much all there is to say about that. 🙂

Other news is that I’m up 9 pounds total now (at 15w1d). After being obsessed about how I haven’t been gaining weight at all—I’d only put on one pound at 12w1d—this big jump was CRAZY. Now I’m like, Eeeeek, is it TOO much? My scary twin pregnancy book says 20-25 pounds by 20 weeks but pretty much everyone under the sun says that’s too much and don’t worry about it. ANYway, I just want these babies to be healthy and nourished perfectly. I’m trying to just go with it. I’m not eating crappy food, I’m not eating too little, I’m not overeating, and that’s about the best I can do, right? (I apologize for obsessing about everything, but this is my vent place!)

The yuck news is that I do indeed have a “small, internal” H. I didn’t know what that was until I was Googling on Monday night but here’s the short version: It’s an inflamed blood vessel that can bleed if brushed by hard, ahem, stool. I figured it was pretty dang early to develop this sort of thing (Google says 3rd tri or post-birth!), but the midwife explained that twin Moms have even more blood flow than the average preggo and that can bring them on sooner.

I don’t care about the H at all, now that I 100% know it’s nothing to worry about. I’m just overjoyed that I got to see our sweet babies and that they are doing well. Now I can fly home this weekend without this dark cloud of anxiety hovering over me. And maybe maybe MAYBE even buy our  first set of onsies while I’m there?!

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26 Comments

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26 responses to “I caved

  1. sienna

    YaAay for getting reassurance that the little ones are ok! A month of not seeing them is way too long, my friend. You were due for a quick peeksie, so I’m glad that you’re feeling better now!! Enjoy ur weekend with the family, yes its definitely time to buy ur first pair of onesies!!! Ps – are u guys finding out the genders?

  2. LTB

    Sorry about your dear friend “H”….oh the things we go through for the babies! So happy to hear everything looks great with both babies! Have fun this weekend!
    LTB

  3. Lesley

    That sounds absolutely adorable!!!

    My weight did the same thing– nothing for the whole first trimester, but now I’m up 20lbs (at 25 weeks). I guess that’s too much, but the OB said it was good, and I am not going to worry about it! I can always lose the weight later, but producing a healthy baby is something you can’t do over.

    xoxox Have a great trip!

  4. Soooooo glad you got to see the babies before your trip home. I totally understand how guarded we get when we haven’t had the reassurance of an ultrasound in a while. I am ALL about buying baby stuff the day or two following an ultrasound, but then it fades and I feel scared to embrace the pregnancy. So this is perfect timing for you to go home, talk nonstop about how cute your babies are, and shop baby stuff with your fam.
    So sorry about the H – that sucks! But good to know it wasn’t anything more serious, but I’ve heard they hurt 😦 Sorry you’re dealing with that unfortunate side effect.
    Anyway, SO glad you got to see them! Have an awesome trip home!

  5. So glad it was only a H. 🙂
    And you got see your babies! So very exiciting. Enjoy your weekend.

  6. Esperanza

    So glad everything looked good! I went in quite a few times in my first trimester because I was freaking out. I’m so glad that they were accommodating and let you see the babies! Now go buy those onsies!

  7. Oh you sneaky girl! But you’re right–a month is waaay too long to go! It’s totally time to buy oneies, my dear.

  8. Tarah

    I’m so glad to hear things are doing well AND you got another sneak peek in on your love bugs! I love ultra sounds, I swear I could stare at it all day and be totally fine! haha.

  9. Peace of mind does wonders for the heart. I’m glad you went. 🙂

  10. Sometimes freaking out is the exact right thing to do. Especially if it gets you a peek at your babies and sets your mind at ease. Growing babies is hard work and you need all the stress relief you can get. I hope you have a great trip home and good luck with the shopping…it’s a big step but I think you are ready.

  11. Jen

    Yay for everything looking great! I am prone to my dear friend, H, anyway, and I got them with a vengeance in the 3T. Then the pushing did me in, and they are STILL hanging around (*ahem*) FIVE months later! I do not wish that upon you!! Hang in there 🙂

  12. Kelly

    Oh, babe, I would have totally done the same thing. I’m so glad you got some peace of mind before your trip and even MORE glad to hear how well those babies are doing!

  13. I suffer from the big “H” as well…it sucks and it is GROSS…I couldn’t believe I would have “that” in the first trimester…but I found out that progesterone suppositories help Hs form…FUN! So glad you got to see your babes…yay!

  14. Glad to hear that the babies are doing well, and that the blood is nothing to worry about!

  15. You are so sneaky but I LOVE that you did it! (You know every single one of us on here would’ve done the same exact thing!) And I heart that you saw the bebes. I’m still going with two boys. Watch it be two girls ;). Either way, I hope they’re healthy and beautiful and wonderful just as we all expect them to be :). xo

  16. I’m so glad that the babies are healthy and well! I hope that the H clears up soon. I get those often, and they hurt like a BITCH. 😦

  17. lady pumpkin

    So glad you got to see your littles before you head home! Sorry about the H, though; that’s a bummer. Everything else sounds great, though. And, you know, just eat intelligently, as it sounds like you are, and I’m sure everything will be a-okay.

  18. AL

    So glad you got to see the twinsies before heading home! (And I am so jealous of your impromptu appointment).

    Have a fantastic worry free trip home!

  19. lifebytheday

    Yay! So glad that everything is good and that you got to see the babies. 🙂 Have a fabulous trip!

  20. CW

    thrilled everything is going so well for you.

  21. It’s okay to be a wimp! Who WOULDN’T want to see their cute little bundles of joy every chance they get? Hope you have a great visit with your family!

  22. I’m glad you asked to be seen. Good for you for getting what you need. You’re not a wimp – you’re just in touch with yourself. And I love hearing about your beautiful babies. 15 weeks! You’re humming right along!

  23. FCblacksheep

    Woo hoo! I’m so happy you got a little peek before you headed home. And ooff…sorry about the H.

  24. Yay for getting to see those beautiful twinsies!! I am sorry about the annoying H, but it was nice, at least, to have the perfect excuse for a look-see inside, right? Enjoy your weekend home and definitely get some shopping in! It sounds like everything is moving along just perfectly!!

  25. finch

    I’m glad you got to see your little buddies. How cute that they interact with each other?? Sounds like you and the babies are all super healthy and well, little “H” aside.

  26. so sorry about h! i have troubles down there if you know what i mean so i’m dreading being constipated. oh well. it’s all worth it, right? 🙂

    i hate that you had a scare with your poo but i’m super glad you followed your gut and went in for a scan. and i’m even more glad that everyone is doing beautifully!

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