Hanging in

We had a GREAT appointment this morning.

  • My cervix is still totally effaced, but Dr. Zen said maybe she could feel a tiny bit of length. I will TAKE IT!
  • My cervix is still a “loose 1cm.” It doesn’t get any better than “no change” at this point. Yip yip yip!
  • We had a growth scan and Baby A is measure 4 pounds 5 ounces and Baby B is 4 pounds 4 ounces. Baby A’s head is waaaaaaay low. Like, so low that the tech was pressing the u/s probe well below my pubic bone. Yikes! No wonder I feel a ton of pressure even laying around on bedrest.
  • I talk to the babies a lot lately. I have been telling Baby A all day that he needs to stay chill and not bump up against my cervie. And then I tell Baby B not to kick her brother and push him down any more. We need the babies to stay chill. Hubs keeps reminding them that they are getting awesome food in utero (homemade Sheperd’s Pie, chili, burgers, shakes, etc.) and that they won’t eat this well again for years….so they should stay put and really enjoy it while they can!
  • The tech said that she could see Baby A practicing his breathing. Awesome job, sweet little guy!
  • I gained 2 pounds in the past week so I am back up to my weight 3 weeks ago, or 28 pounds total. I continue to eat protein and milkshakes like it’s my job. Because, seriously, it is.
  • My blood pressure was a little high. It almost got me sent to L&D for a pre-eclampsia work-up. They checked it several times…ay yi yi. Fortunately Dr. Zen chalked it up to my nerves about the cervix check, but I heard her telling the nurse we need to keep an eye on it.
  • This is a little embarrassing, but I had to fill out a depression screening form today and Dr. Zen kept telling me I need be calm. I think the midwife who checked me last week must’ve written “This patient is crazyyyyyyyyyyyyyy” on my chart last week. I explained to her, and to Dr. Zen again today, that I am not depressed. I am just scared! And when I am scared, I get teary-eyed. I love my babies so much and want them to have the best start in life possible. I am doing better at managing my fears and emotions…every day we make it is a major boost to my heart and psyche.
  • I downloaded some meditations on iTunes last week and have been listening to them every other day. And I am avoiding bad karma in every way I possibly can. (Including deleting the mean anon comment I got over the weekend. I 200% get it: I am totally and completely lucky to be pregnant, even if I am at severe risk of delivering preemie babies who will be in the NICU for weeks or months. If it bugs you to read what’s up with me, please don’t visit my blog!)

I think that’s it. I am very happy to be where I am today. Thank you lord, for our sweet babies and for letting us come this far. I continue my mantra: One more day, one more day, one more day. All I can do is think about today. Today today today. We love you so much sweet litte Baby A and Baby B.



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27 responses to “Hanging in

  1. That’s such good news! You are doing amazing.

  2. Great report – so happy you’ve made it this far!!

  3. lady pumpkin

    “I continue to eat protein and milkshakes likes itโ€™s my job. Because, seriously, it is.” <– This is awesome. Everybody just breathe deeply (that's for you, our fledgling-breather Baby A!) and stay where you are. You're doing great!!! xoxo

  4. Yay! For another day where those babies are where they should be (for now). You are doing great! I keep checking back for updates. Stay Zen! xo

  5. jc

    YAY, GREAT GREAT JOB EGG!!!!!!!!!! =) Hang in there and keep eating those milkshakes, eat one for me =).

  6. Connie

    Hang in there !! Literally !!! De-lurking to wish you continued luck. Everything’s going to be fine. N yay for you deleting anon and their negativity….. that’s something you DON’T need right now. ๐Ÿ™‚

  7. sienna

    babies are getting nice and chubby!! it’s been what, 2.5 weeks since bedrest? let’s go another 2.5 before the babies come! (i’m getting greedy on your behalf). you don’t sound depressed at all. just scared, which any of us would be. but you’re doing greeeeat!!! hang in there egg!! xoxo.

  8. lifebytheday

    Wow, you are a ROCKSTAR! Congrats to your cervix!! LOL
    Definitely keep doing what you’re doing – including ignoring mean people! Just because you were finally blessed with two babies doesn’t mean that early labor and NICU stays aren’t SCARY!!
    I’ll keep praying for you and your beautiful babies ๐Ÿ™‚

  9. Lesley

    Yay! No change! Oh, that’s just wonderful news!! I was getting all teary-eyed at my OB’s appointments, too, out of maternal worry. I got questioned about depression based on that, too. So silly– why is it considered pathological for a mommy to be worried about her babies?? You’re doing great. Enjoy all those milkshakes! Mmmm…

  10. Look at you rockin the 32 weeks. ๐Ÿ™‚ I’m loving those baby weights. You must just breathe a little easier every single day.

    This is just my opinion, but I think you should have a chocolate/banana malt tonight…no pressure. ๐Ÿ™‚

  11. Who in the world would make a rude anon comment on any of your posts!?! How ridic. Anyway, what great news!! DH is right: those babes are living the life right now so they better stay put for a few more weeks! ๐Ÿ™‚

  12. This is all such good, good, good, good stuff. Keep growing babies! Keep getting nice and chubby! Keep practicing that breathing!

    PS: Let me at this “anonymous” individual. I will cut a bitch. How could anyone for a second question your love and gratitude for these babies? Only someone who hasn’t spent three minutes reading your blog. Stupidhead. (Not you, them).

  13. YES! YAY! Keep it up! Bad commenters? F-them. So glad that you had a good appointment – we continue to pray for you guys!

  14. FCblacksheep

    YAY babies! Practicing breathing…how cute. And hubs is so right. It will take a while to get to burger and chili level. Keep on feeding those babies right and they’ll stick around.

    You got a nasty comment? Grrrrr….raises my blood pressure.

    You’re doing beautifully Egg! Keep on hanging in there. We’re all so proud.

  15. I’m so very happy for you! I have a whole church of people praying for you and the babies! They will be thrilled to know you are doing so great and the babes and still where they belong for now. Keep only the positive thoughts and doing the perfect things for your babies. You are the mommy….and nothing is more important that your job!

  16. wooohooooo AWESOME job!!! i am so happy for you and your (chubby!) babies ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ™‚

  17. Heidi

    holy cow–they are so big already!!! woo hoo baby A and baby B–way to grow and be patient!!! i’m crazy paranoid/in love/24-7 thinking of my growing baby, too, so keep those depression screens away from me! ๐Ÿ™‚ so happy for you–God is so good!

  18. Andrea

    Oh Egg, this is all SUCH great stuff!! You are doing awesome, and the babies are obviously rockin it! Keep up your mantra and the daily milkshakes, YUM! I hope you’ve treated yourself to a shamrock shake, or 7…hah! Anyways, continuing to send zen vibes your way!!

  19. SUCH awesome news! Keep it up – you’re doing great. Those babies are getting BIG and STRONG! You are getting so close to 34 weeks! Keep eating for those babies and don’t let mean comments or BP or despression screenings worry you one bit. I really don’t understand why the docs act surprised when we’re anxious or scared…I thought I was going to scream if one more person told me to relax or asked me why I was so nervous during my hospital stays/labor. I know you’re in the best place you can be right now and hubs will be your rock.

  20. Wow, talk about some nice, pudgy babies!! You are doing so well. Can I come over for lunch? I’d love me some shepherd’s pie and a nice big shake!!!

  21. Yay! All the stuff you’re doing for your sweet babies is paying off! You’re already a great mother! My cousin’s baby was born at 4.5 pounds; she had to spend a little time in the NICU, but she was totally fine – just tiny.

  22. That’s such great news! You’re doing so well! Keep eating yourself out of house and home.

  23. AL

    Yay, cervie!! So happy to hear there’s no change..keep taking care of yourself and hang in there Egg! xoxo

  24. You are so amazing! ๐Ÿ™‚

    And don’t worry about the depression screening. You’ll have to fill out a million of them after the birth…and for the first 12 months of pediatrician appointments too.

  25. lyn

    yay! hang in there!!!

  26. I love what your husband is telling the babies about food…that is priceless (and so true)!!! It sounds like you are in high spirits despite the worry I am sure you feel. Your babies are doing so well and so are you!!! Keep updating, please! xoxo

  27. Stopping in to say “hello” and hoping that the babies are still baking. Good luck with everything!

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