Hihi!

Push publish, push publish, push publish. That’s my blogging mantra.

Disclaimer: I know these are going to be the world’s most annoying updates for all of my IF friends still in the @#*&$#@(* trenches. I love you all and apologize in advance.

The update from my corner of the universe is that all is well, and all is nutso. All at once..

• Hubs has been criss-crossing the country for the past two weeks interviewing for jobs, and he will continue to do so until the end of February. Last week, his first on the road, I struggled big-time with the whole single parent slash full-time working Mom to two 10-month-olds thing. (No sympathy please! Big props to all the folks out there who do it every.single.day!!) I just felt perpetually frazzled and like my heart was always beating faster. One morning, Champ tipped over a lamp in the living room. I was one step too slow to prevent the tippage. One worst-Mom-ever step. He was FINE, it didn’t fall in his direction or anything, but I was not. I was thiiiiiiiis close to crying. That night, in a frantic blur of a bus ride home to relieve the nanny, I was pick-pocketed. It was a mess (it continues to be a mess). I made a promise to myself that night that I would SLOW DOWN, remember to breathe, take an extra moment to gather myself, etc.

* And then the next morning as I settled into my bus seat en route to work and couldn’t find my iPhone, I was certain I’d dropped it on the sidewalk as I’d sprinted a block to catch the bus—so much for slowing down—thankfully it was at home sitting in the charging station, but I admit I did well up with tears on that bus ride. GET IT TOGETHER, GET IT TOGETHER, YOU’VE GOT TWO BABIES DEPENDING ON YOU, YOU CAN’T LOSE YOUR SH*T NOW!!! That’s all I could think last week.

• On the upside, the babies do not seem to be effected by my general aura of Very Frazzled Woman.

• This week went A LOT better—no wallet stolen, no broken lamp, no cell phone dramatics (please no jinxies, haha)—mostly because my Mom came to visit and with her help I didn’t feel like I was baking in a pressure cooker.

• Much to my dismay, because I truly love my job, I am feeling verrrrry blah about work lately. This really set in after the holidays. I had the entire week between Christmas and New Year’s with the babies and it was utter bliss. I realized in that week HOW MUCH they change every single day and how wonderful it is to be PRESENT for those changes….it was hard-hard-hard to go back to the office and leave them under someone else’s care. (I adore our nanny, it’s not about that.) I have recently experienced actual physical jealousy toward stay at home moms—even though I know what an incredibly exhausting and difficult job it is.

• My current work malaise is probably one of those cliche cases of the grass-is-always-greener. Also, it’s freezing outside and dark/gray and it’s just kind of a bummie of a time of year. [Side note: Please let hubs snag a job, please please please. It’s a tough job market and a competitive field. We are so hoping something comes together.]

• As for the babies, they are as awesome and amazing as you could possibly imagine. They light up my life in endlessly wonderful ways. The amount I have belly-laughed since they entered the world is astounding. I love their sweet baby smells, their smiles, their laughs, their splashing in the tub. I love the way they clutch at my shirt and whimper and bury their faces in my neck as I lower them into their cribs for bed at night. I love watching them on the baby monitor as they stand up at the place where their cribs almost meet and babble to each other and hand toys back and forth. I love how they scrunch up their faces and snort and smile and bounce with excitement (haha, it’s true) on their tip toes as I come into their room every morning at dawn. I love how they crawl all over me, and how they bring me books to read, and how they love to play Rolly Poly on the floor with me as the sun rises. I love eveything about them with every ounce of my being. I am so so so lucky to be living this life.

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16 Comments

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16 responses to “Hihi!

  1. Holy smokes! What a week! Champ and Honey sounds like so much fun.

  2. So very good to hear from you and about the kiddos! May hubs find what he’s looking for soonsoonsoon. xoxo

  3. i’ve missed you, egg! i know you wouldn’t change it for anything, but that doesn’t mean that what you’re doing isn’t really freakin’ hard. i had to laugh, though, at your “pull your shit together, lady” pep talk to yourself :). i’ll be putting good thoughts out to the universe that hubs finds an awesome job, and soon.

  4. Oh I wish I could see Champ and Honey babbling to each other like that! So sweet. Your twinsies are just amazing and I know you know what a lucky mommy you are. It doesn’t make what you’re doing any less hard. I really hope hubs’s job situation works out soon and you’re back to having help again. I know how tough academic job hunts are 😦

    And the grass is always greener, isn’t it? I’m glad to go back to school and scared also. So hard, but so worth it.

  5. Lesley

    It’s soo good to hear from you! I am excited about your husband’s job interviews, and I know he’ll get something good. Your babies sound amazing, and I’m glad everything is going so well (if BUSY).

  6. I can’t think of anything more sweet than watching those two babies passing toys back and forth to each other. So, so sweet. And I know exactly what you mean w/the nuzzling in your neck before putting down to sleep–A-mazing feeling.

    Totally understand the grass is always greener w/staying at home. But I think once hubs gets his awesome job and you can quit and be home w/the babes and do your other work from home you’ll be SO happy you did. No more being on someone else’s schedule except the babies. Take work jobs when you want to, etc. I think you’ll love it. I really think the grass is greener over here.

    Missed seeing your posts, friend! Love reading them! Xo

  7. AL

    So good to hear from you, Miss Egg! I’m glad the babies and you are doing well, though it sounds like this is a very hectic time for you! So sorry for the crappy week last week, it sounds awful and exhausting. Just horrible shit that you dont need to deal with.

    Best of luck to your hubs on finding a job and would love to get all of the IF group babies together at some point, if possible.

  8. Hey stranger good to hear from you!

    two babies would be exhausting! does this mean you might have to move with hubbies job? maybe you get to be a sahm?

    Glad things are hectic but good! Miss you!

  9. I have missed you, my friend!! Hope you are going a bit easier on yourself this week! Love hearing about those sweet twinks!!! The girls hugged last week for the first time and I just about died and went to Heaven (after snapping pictures, of course!). This makes me even more excited for the next few months. Give yourself a big ol’ pat on the back, you are doing such a great job!!! xoxo

  10. Great Post KEEP IT UP
    I’ve been using HOME CHECK OVULATION TEST KIT for a long time and I still get butterflies when that little smiley shows his face. 🙂 I got one from the internet by searching on Google HOME CHECK OVULATION KIT it was great!

  11. Oh, Egg! How happy I was to see a post from you!! Although it would have been better with a pic or two of those sweet babies! 😉 I hope that things have improved since that one, terrible week. When it rains it pours, I suppose. I hope that the hubs finds the right job fir for him and you guys can get settled into a new routine soon!

  12. Yay! So glad to see a post from you! That sounds like a super crap week. Chip up, and Honey and Champ sound amazing.

  13. FCblacksheep

    I’ve been wanting to comment for a bit. Oh they sound so big (and freaking adorable)! I can’t believe it! Yay to hubs and I’m putting out all kinds of good mojo for him and the job hunt. And pick pocketed? Oh my. That alone would’ve been enough to break me.

  14. sure do miss your posts!!! you’re not busy, right???? POST PLEASE!!

  15. AL

    Hi, you, just wondering how you are and hope all is well. xoxoxo

  16. Debbie

    Hey girly! I have been completely MIA in blog land for a while, too. Just wanted to say hi and hope all is well!!

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