Tag Archives: period

Birth story

I wrote most of this post in the hospital. Here’s how it all went down in the wee hours of Monday, March 21…

12am The night before cervix check appointments, I get pretty anxious and tend to stay up late in the hopes that I can tire myself out enough to get to sleep. That’s how it happened that I was reading a magazine in bed at midnight. Hubs was awake, too, and we were reading/chatting in bed.  As I was switching positions,I felt a “pop” or “snap” sensation in my tum, and my first thought was, “Could that be my water breaking?!” I’ve Googled “water breaking” enough times to know a lot of folks describe it that way. My second thought was, “Naaaaaah. Must’ve tweaked a muscle or something as I was shifting in bed.”

But I went to the bathroom to check it out and my undies were wet. Not Niagra Falls by any means, but soaked with clear fluid (no scent, yeah, I checked). I wasn’t feeling any contractions, but I did start to shake with adrenaline immediately. I knew that, at 35w3d, they wouldn’t stop labor and if this was really my water breaking, and we were going to meet the babies!

12:05am I paged my clinic and the OB on call (the awesome Dr. M) rang me back in a few minutes. She said it did indeed sound like my water had broken and to head to triage and they’d page her later if I was in labor. I already had my hospital bag packed, but suddenly simply finding my pants and shoes and locking up the apartment were tough tasks to accomplish—I was so shaky! Now the contrax began. Not the tensed uterus feeling I’d learned to pinpoint from my preterm labor scare, but pretty darn bad period-esq cramps.

12:15am Hubs pulled up with the car and I plopped into the front seat with my bag. En route to triage, the period cramps intensified in a major way. It wasn’t horrible pain, but it was def intense enough that I was doing some deep breathing. The car ride was kind of surreal. It had stormed all day and the streets were wet, dark and empty.

12:45am With no traffic in the middle of the night, we were at the hospital lickety split. We hung out in the triage waiting area for about 10 minutes waiting to be seen and the cramps became seriously awful, consuming my entire body. I was wondering if I should make a bigger deal about them to the triage check-in person, but felt like all preggos must feel like this when they show up in labor: totally uncomfortable and kinda dying with pain. While waiting to be taken into a monitoring room, we made a bet on how dilated I’d be. I guessed 7cm. Hubs guessed 5cm.

1am We get taken into a monitoring room in triage and now the contractions were, like, totally severe. I ask for the first time when I can get the epidural. At this point, I was starting to become concerned that there wasn’t enough urgency with my situation. No one had checked my cervix and I was having a ton of pressure and contractions that absolutely huuuuurt. In retrospect, I should’ve articulated how I was feeling the moment I checked in at triage, but hey, I’ve never been in labor and figured this was the drill. Hubs told the triage nurse that my contractions were coming roughly every 45 seconds or minute and was that cause for concern? “No, she’s fine,” said the nurse. She continued messing around with fetal HR monitors, swabbing to check if there’s amniotic fluid present to see if I really broke my water, etc.

1:15am The triage nurse finally checks my cervix. Her eyes BUG OPEN. She grabs her phone to call for backup: “The twin patient is presenting! Page Dr. M! Prep the OR!” Turns out I’m already 10cm dilated and she can see Baby A’s head in +2 station. AHHH!!! It’s like we’re in a movie all of a sudden, and I’m on the wheeled hospital bed, being rushed to the elevator bank and up to the OR. It was honestly pretty freaky.

1:30am In OR prep, I’m in agony. The contractions are all-consuming and nearly constant. The nurses blow out two veins (you should see my left arm, it’s still black and blue) trying to get an IV in and I’m on the verge of flipping out. [Hubs says the reason they keep fracking up the IV is that I’ve stressed them out so much by continuously asking, “Is it in? Can I get the epidural now?”] They finally get it in and I’m taken into the OR to wait for Dr. M and for an epidural. I probably ask a dozen more times, “Where is the anesthesiologist? I want the epidural!” Hahaha.

2am The epidural is placed. SWEET RELIEF! Seriously, it’s like I’m a new person as we wait for Dr. M to get to the hospital. She arrives and checks out my cervix. She says we can start pushing now, but Baby A is sunny-side up and she’s hoping he’ll change position. Also, because I now can’t feel much (yay epidural!), she wants me to chillax for a bit in a special side-lying position to see if he’ll move and face the other direction, and to give me some rest before pushing. I feel like a new person, soooo excited to meet Baby A and Baby B and ready to gather my strength.

230am The nurses have Wilco playing for us on the computer and we’re all just hanging out in the OR. Life is good, haha. At about this point I begin to feel the contractions again (NOTHING like before tho!). Dr. M tells me this is good stuff, it’ll be better for pushing.

3am I’m rested up. Baby A has turned. I get a crash course on how to push/breathe out a baby. We begin with my next contraction.

3:23am Char.les William is born—screaming pink and beautiful. Utter relief as I watch his screaming body being whisked away to the annex room where a team of pediatricians are waiting. Dr. M says Baby B is still head down and that I can begin pushing/breathing again on my next contraction.

3:26am Lucy Elizabeth is born—also screaming, pink and beautiful. Unbelievable relief and joy ensue.

3:30am While Dr. M sews me up (there was some rippage), hubs goes back and forth between the annex room where teams of docs are monitoring the babies, and my bedside, showing me pics of our sweet little things. WE ARE IN LOVE WITH THESE BABIES!!!!!!! I was a celebrity in the hospital for a couple of days with all of the doctors and nurses thanks to whole arriving-at-10cm-dilated-and-presenting-a-head-and-two-babies-born-two-hours-later thing.

The end. The beginning. 🙂

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You-know-who is in the house…

She has arrived. Phew. (See what my body did there? It made me GRATEFUL for my period…sneaky!)

Now, please friends, positive thoughts for no cysties because I really am a better person when I’m actively cycling. Sitting on the sidelines (and thus, effectively 60 day-ish cycles) feels like pure agony/seriously challenges my already impatient disposition/just plain suuuuucks.

That is all. 🙂

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It’s talk to Egg about your baby day…

I think I have a sign on me this very snowy morning that says “I would absolutely love to hear about your newborn/toddler/baby right now so please gush away!!”

On the elevator up to the office, a coworker with baby twins chatted me up rather suddenly. She wanted to explain why it is that she is so thrilled to be back at work. She’d spent the week off watching, feeding and playing with her twin babies and had been absolutely EXHAUSTED. Work is so much easier! Babies are so hard! I’m so lucky it’s just me and hubs!

As I settled into my desk, a coworker with a 19-month-old IMed me this out of the blue: “Q has sooo much personality these days. He climbs on chairs and couches every chance he gets. He keeps finding new ways to get into trouble but is so cute we can’t get too mad! I’m bringing him into the office soon!” That’s soooo cute! Great! I can’t wait to see him!

I walked to the break room for my third mug of coffee (more on that later) and my coworker with a four-month-old boy asked what we did for the holidays. “Flew home to Kansas City to see my parents and siblings, it was great!” I said, “How about you guys?” Instead of traveling to Boston like they do every year, they stayed in town for the first time EVER because they are “building their own family now.” Of course! Right! That’s so awesome!

Back at my desk, I clicked on my personal email account to find a blast from the past message from a former coworker. He was in the mood to talk about his toddler and to share some pics of her! Here is what HE had to say: “M is quite a little talker, it turns out – she’s not yet two and a half, and she’s totally verbal. The other day, she was enjoying a sucker, and she said, ‘This sucker feels warm in my tummy, daddy.’ Isn’t that funny? She loves all of the things a two-year-old should love – Elmo, Sesame Street, the various princesses, Olivia the pig, and so on. She kills me.” Oh, wow! Yes, so funny! That is so killer!!!!

I’m sorry, I’m being a total and complete JEEEEERK BAAAAALLLLLLL. All of these folks are AWESOME. I can understand why you’d gush about your baby, especially when you have cute holiday stories to share. I get it, because I want to gush about a baby I don’t even have! I don’t know, maybe it’s just in the water today. Maybe it’s because it’s snowing cats and dogs outside and they’re missing seeing their little cutie pies all bundled up? Or maybe it’s not about them at all, and it’s actually about ME BEING CRAZY-TOWN AND SUDDENLY NOTICING EVERYONE AND THEIR MOTHER HAS A BABY OR IS PREGNANT, EVEN CHARACTERS IN THE SEASON FOUR LOST RERUNS I’VE BEEN WATCHING LATELY?! Dunno. 🙂

Oh yeah, so I’m guzzling coffee again. Because my temp dropped all the way down to pre-ovulation levels today. Still no sign of my period, which is officially becoming annoying, but it’s just a matter of time. My luteal phase is already a day longer than it was on my last Clomid cycle, and that just proves the Rule of Egg: my body is stubbornly unpredictable. And to add injury to insult, because my RE’s office asked me to when I got my awesomely-misleading P4 results (just to me, of course), I took an HPT test this morning. We all know how that went down: BFN. Eh, whatever, it was not a crushing experience. I think the temping sorta prepares you for the blow, so you suffer little by little instead of getting punched in the stomach.

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Nosedive

So after bemoaning my symptom-less body yesterday, karma bit me in the arse and served up some weak period-ish cramps last night after work. And I swear there were two drops of pinkish pre-period stuff when I wiped at 8pm. I felt crampy again very early this morning in bed. And the kicker: My temp plummeted. I just want AF to show up already! Or maybe I don’t, because every hour/day she doesn’t come is another hour/day for any potential residual cysts to go away so I can actually begin cycling again this month. Ah, well, it doesn’t really matter what I want, does it? 🙂

I had some delusional hope blowing in the background these past couple weeks….whooosh!….the wind is definitely out of my sails.

!@*%^$%$%#@#!#

Okay, I feel better now. 🙂

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Pheeeeew

My period came. I woke up at about 4am thinking I was having period-like cramps, but I chalked it up to my active imagination. A couple hours later, I discovered it was the real deal. Thank the lord!

Thank you all so much for your wonderful comments. They were immensely calming as I tried to squelch the doomsday scenarios going through my head. I mean it, each one helped me. It’s a little bit wonky when you feel like your life is revolving around your period, but no one said this was smooth ride.

Needless to say, I am beyond relieved. Thank you body, for doing this. It was later than I wanted/expected, but I’ll take it. If the cyst is gone and if I start Clomid on Sunday and if I ovulate at this dose, there’s still a tiny chance I could do the IUI before Christmas. That’s a lot of if’s, huh? I’m trying hard not to get my hopes up.

In other news, I called my RE’s office at the crack of dawn. Turns out they DO keep weekend hours for monitoring appointments. (This was news to me, that’s another story though.) Which is awesome!! I was ready to take a cab there in my pajamas this morning, but no need. I’ll go in on Sunday at 7am for CD3 bloodwork and ultrasound.

The next million dollar question: Is the cyst gone??? I sure hope so! 🙂

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The waiting game

Sooooo. While all of the other IF bloggies I read seem to be moving at warp speed (Clomid! Ultrasound! Ovidrel! Positive OPK! Progesterone spikes! 2ww!), my own journey is stuck in a bit of a rut. 🙂 I’m waiting for my period folks. Waiting, waiting, waiting.

The past couple of times I’ve taken Provera, my period showed up 36 and 48 hours after popping the last pill. So I’m already a bit behind schedule. (But me impatient? Never! Haha.) I finished up the Provera in the wee dawn hours of Monday morning. I had an acupuncture session yesterday. I was hoping I’d wake up to spotting this morning. No such luck!

Anway, I wish I had some awesome news to report. I was really hoping to be able to get into the RE for baseline tests (dum dum dum, is the cyst gone?) before the weekend. This cycle’s timeline is sensitive because I’d really like to do an IUI before leaving town on the 24th. I know that’s a silly thing to focus on and it’s not a huge deal if it doesn’t work out that way (heck, a month ago I was nervous about even DOING an IUI!). But still, after a month of sitting around doing nothing on the baby-making front, I am so raring to get this cycle up and running.

I know there’s still time, I’m just starting to get nervous. I’ve already done all the tricks (wear white undies, threaten taking an HPT), but my period is nowhere to be found. And so, I wait.

Workout update: I’ve been a little under the weather since the weekend so I was totally cool with taking Monday and Tuesday off working out. Today I rode my road bike in front of the Today Show for 45 minutes. Nothing crazy, just a mellow sweat session as it sleeted/snowed/looked like the North Pole out the window.

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On to the next!

My period has arrived. I’m not having much crampiness and this is about as light a “flow” as you can imagine, but it is legit, even if it’s a mini period. Yip yip yip!

Why am I so excited? Well, in case you couldn’t tell, I was soooo worried there wasn’t enough of a Progesterone spike to bring it on. I was trying hard not to be all doom and gloom, but the thought of waiting around for a no-show period—then going back on my old friend Provera—really, really had me down. But yep, my RE was right: The period came. Today is CD27, er, CD1. That seems like a nice, sorta normal-sounding cycle-length, right? So now it’s Clomid cycle #2, I am officially on to the next!

Now I realize my body didn’t do this on its own (thanks, Clomid, kisses!), but isn’t it nice when it does what it’s supposed to? (Hey body, please keep following directions when we start popping the 100mg pills, k? Please!!!! You will make me so happy if you do!!) By the way, I finally got in touch with a nurse on Tuesday with my CD21 follow-up Qs (I spoke to Gina, the really, really awesome/nice one) and she said my 3.5 number was GOOD. I told her I’d spent a lot of time researching this online and that the 3.5 didn’t seem good according to ANY OTHER source. She said I need to remember my body is MY body and I have a doctor treating MY situation. Everyone is different, yada yada.

She also informed me there was a chance I could be preggo based on the 3.5 reading. What the what?! I didn’t really believe her, to be totally honest, but it was comforting to have someone rooting for a cycle I’d long since written off.

Anyway, now I wait for Dr. C’s orders. Gina mentioned on Tuesday that they will likely up the monitoring this cycle (from zilch to somethin’), which I am ALL FOR, and that we’d probably up the dosage to 100mg Clomid, too. Great, bring it on! I’m ready to start fattening up some follies. Let’s do this!

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